It isn’t about control really, I know I don’t have any in this RPL journey…or blame, or frustration, or desperation. It is about strength. I know I am strong because I’m still standing after everything I’ve been through. But I want to feel strong. I want my body to feel strong.
Does this have anything to do with TTC? Yes, I think that is undeniable, but I’m tired. I’m tired of feeling trampled into the ground day after day, loss after loss. I’m tired of feeling vulnerable and most importantly, I’m tried of feeling like the worst version of myself. I want to feel strong and I want to be proud of my body.
So, I am taking care of me..something I promised myself I’d do this time. Here is what I’ve been up to:
Monday- I started a weight loss challenge at my gym, where I am working with a trainer and I am on a team (there are 4 of us) competing against other teams (3 other teams).
- I weighed in at my highest weight ever which was so incredibly depressing, but I’m hoping that’s as high as the number will ever be.
- I started logging on My Fitness Pal (if you want to exchange usernames, email me at email@example.com)
- In my first hour with my team and trainer we did not workout. We weighed in, took measurements, calculated body fat, and discussed our goals and what is keeping us from losing weight. I was honest about RPL with my trainer.
- After meeting with the trainer I stayed and did ‘Ease into 5K’ app outside and started on W2D2.
It was early, but the scenery was beautiful and it was about 60F, perfect day for a run/jog.
Later that night, my husband and I went for a walk. (I’m not counting these calories on MFP)
- I went for a walk in the morning (Again, I’m not counting these calories on MFP)
- Then at 4:00 I met a friend at her school to do T25 in her classroom. I burned 366 calories in less than a half an hour.
- Tried a new workout at Sky Zone, which is an indoor trampoline park. It was a ‘Lunch Express’ workout, so it was 30 minutes and the cost was $9. My sister and I were the only two in class, so there was no slacking. I ended up burning 500 calories in a half an hour.
- Later that night, I went to the gym and did the elliptical and burned another 200 calories.
- Worked out with my trainer from 6-7am- we started with cardio, then worked on arms, did lunges and squats. We ended running the mile, which I ran in 10 mintes, 19 seconds.
- Thursday night, my husband and I watched “The Biggest Loser” and did the workouts Twitter provided during the commercials. At one point my husband was doing squats while holding our English Bulldog (who weighs 60lbs). Which meant I was doing squats laughing. Working on abs I guess?
- Side note: One of the contestants on The Biggest Loser is suffering from RPL after having her first child. I’m sort of attached to her so I can’t stop watching TBL.
- I got up early and went to the gym to get it out of the way. I decided I wouldn’t stop until I burned 600 calories. I burned 500 in the gym doing ‘Ease into 5K’ on the treadmill, a skiing machine and abs. Then for the last 100 calories I went outside for a power walk.
- I did terrible with my eating at breakfast. My husband and I go out Saturdays with his dad. I thought I was okay. I got eggs, whole wheat toast, coffee (cream and sugar), and home fries. It added up to 615 calories!!!
- I was in shock, but the damage was already done so I set a goal to burn off breakfast!!
- I did T25 Cardio and the stretching DVD and burned 462 calories in an hour and then I cleaned for another hour and did lunges or skipped every time I had to go past the living room. :) I ended up burning just about 100 calories in a short time.
- I also scrubbed my kitchen floor with a magic eraser and a steam cleaner and burned 830 calories in 3 hours! I was so proud of myself and I have one clean floor!! :)
- It was T’s Birthday so we went out to breakfast (I had oatmeal this time) and we had a party with his side of the family Sunday night. I made mostly healthy choices except the Friendly’s Oreo ice cream cake. I cheated, but it was worth it.
- Today was my rest day, so I didn’t work out.
Monday’s weigh-in: Starting week 2 of the challenge
According to My Fitness Pal, I lost 1.8, but my trainer’s record said I lost 2.8. Apparently I weighed a pound more than I thought (which is super depressing). So, I’m going with 2.8! T lost 5.4lbs and I’m super proud of him!!
Random thoughts: I absolutely LOVE my heartrate monitor! If you don’t have one I would highly recommend getting one. I find I work so much harder because I’m wearing it. I also made this Pinterest inspired way of tracking my progress (it’s a little crooked because T was talking to me, but it still works)